“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
Oscar Wilde · An Ideal Husband, 1895
Wilde is making a sardonic observation about how audiences and crowds behave. People are quite willing to overlook faults, scandals, and ordinary failings, he says, but they bristle at exceptional talent because it makes demands on them. Genius disrupts comfortable standards and forces comparison, so it tends to provoke resentment rather than gratitude. The line exposes a certain democratic suspicion of excellence dressed up as tolerance.
This line appears in "Intentions," a collection of critical essays Wilde published in 1891. The book gathered his thoughts on art, criticism, and the relationship between the artist and society, written in a dialogue form that let Wilde develop arguments playfully while still making pointed cases. The essays championed the idea that art should not be judged by moral or utilitarian standards, and several passages in the book skewered what Wilde saw as the mediocrity of popular taste. This particular line fits neatly into that broader argument.
Oscar Wilde was an Irish playwright and writer who became famous in London literary and social circles in the 1880s and 1890s. Beyond his plays and his novel "The Picture of Dorian Gray," he was a serious critic who believed strongly in the autonomy of art and the importance of individual creative vision. His critical writing was often provocative by design, intended to unsettle received opinion. He remains one of the most quoted writers in the English language, admired for the way he combined elegance with intellectual challenge.
“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.”
Oscar Wilde · An Ideal Husband, 1895
“The truth is rarely pure and never simple.”
Oscar Wilde · The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895
“A little sincerity is a dangerous thing, and a great deal of it is absolutely fatal.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“The imagination imitates. It is the critical spirit that creates.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“To live is the rarest thing in the world. Most people exist, that is all.”
Oscar Wilde · The Soul of Man Under Socialism, 1891
“Experience is simply the name we give our mistakes.”
Oscar Wilde · Lady Windermere's Fan, 1892
“There is only one thing in the world worse than being talked about, and that is not being talked about.”
Oscar Wilde · The Picture of Dorian Gray, 1890
“Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.”
Oscar Wilde · Intentions, 1891
“The only way to behave to a woman is to make love to her, if she is pretty, and to someone else, if she is plain.”
Oscar Wilde · The Importance of Being Earnest, 1895
“A man who does not think for himself does not think at all.”
Oscar Wilde · The Soul of Man Under Socialism, 1891
“With freedom, books, flowers, and the moon, who could not be happy?”
Oscar Wilde · attributed, widely documented
“The books one reads in childhood, and perhaps most of all the bad and good bad books, create in one's mind a sort of false map of the world.”
Oscar Wilde · De Profundis, 1905